In the UAE!

Okay - so since my last post in MSP, I've:

A) Wanted to put my foot through the head of the LARGE woman who decided to do Jazzercize in the aisle of the airplane. Now I've nothing against large women, nor Jazzercize (though I think it's just so *totally* 80s, fer sure!), but this woman kept ramming her ample bottom into people and not even acknowledging it! Excuse me, but I think that's what lavs are for. :)

B) Wondered at the site of all of the widebody planes in Amsterdam. Minimalist airport. Pretty cool stuff around it (I of course love the "NO SMOKING" signs, with people hanging all over them, smoking). And my first meal outside of the flying aluminum tube was a cheese and pickle sandwich. But it was brown. I didn't ask... I was afraid to.

C) Almost taken out by a Dutch guy on a cellphone, driving one of those passenger trams around the airport. Have you ever been in a Puerto Rican cab? You know, the kind that as soon as you step in, it's chilly, and you somehow feel closer to the Gods that you pray to, as you're sucked into the seatback? It's the only place on earth that the cars actually ARE measured in how fast they can get to Warp speed. Oh - except the one incident where, in San Francisco, I told the cabbie "We need to get to the theature - and HURRY!". I still have the seatbelt impression in one of my kidneys from that.

D) Ridden in a Mercedes taxi. Actually, ridden in a Mercedes at all - much less a Mercedes taxi. The guy claimed not to know much English, until it came time to pay him. Then he was all cutsie chuckles. I paid him just to leave me alone!

And now it's almost 12:30AM UAE time, and I have to be up in 6 hours. BEDTIME!